6 STEPS TO REMEDY MARITAL INFIDELITY

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Overcoming your marital infidelity
takes time and energy.
These steps can be used as a guide to save marriages after an episode of extramarital affair. The steps could help married couples to restore trust and build a better marriage. Saving a marriage after an act of infidelity takes courage, hard work and honesty.

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Emotional affairs, multiple affairs and one-nightstand are types of extramarital affairs. Here are the six steps to save your marriage after cheating on your partner.

1) APOLOGIZE

Apologizing for betraying your spouse is a simple, powerful way to start overcoming infidelity. You are in pain, and so is your partner. You may feel defensive, scared and confused but a sincere apology without excuses or rationales is the first step in saving your marriage after infidelity. No matter how unstable your marriage was before you betrayed your spouse, admit that you were responsible, and that you were wrong to have your emotional affair, one-night stand or multiple affairs.

2) LISTEN

No matter how bad it make you feel, let your partner share feeling of betrayal, pain, disgust, rage, or frustration. Listen intently, until your partner is finished talking. Put your feelings of guilt, remorse, or pain aside. Overcoming marital infidelity involves emotional sacrifice and painful, vulnerable communication. If you want to save your marriage, you need to work to built a better relationship.

3) DISCUSS THE AFFAIR

Your spouse deserves answers. So, you need to give the answers. Do not avoid settling the problem. Share some details of how and why you betrayed your spouse. Discuss the affair in terms of how it comes about and how you and your spouse can ensure that it will not happen again. To overcome marital infidelity, talk about a plan to protect yourselves from another affair.

4) CHANGE YOUR LIFESTYLE

After you have cheated on your partner, you are no longer free to follow your old patterns. Accepting new limits and boundaries. For example: avoid any intimate relationship with the opposite sex will go far in overcoming marital infidelity. Regain your spouse's trust by being open to reasonable requests regarding boundaries and behaviour. You can find someone that you can trust to give their opinion. For example, marriage counseling will help both of you to see what is reasonable. They have a lot of experience in marriage problems and remedies that would help you save your marriage.

5) TALK ABOUT YOUR LIFESTYLE CHANGES

Change your lifestyle to be true to your spouse and avoid future marital infidelity. Ask for your spouse opinion about the changes that you intend to do.

6) ACCEPT A LONG PERIOD OF HEALING

After you have betrayed your spouse, it will take longer than a few weeks to heal! Your partner will probably watch you closely for at least a year after the affair. It will take awhile to accept everyday occurrences, such as being late for dinner or sudden change in your daily routines.

Read more at Suite101: Overcoming Infidelity and Rebuilding Trust: How to Save Your Marriage After Cheating on Your Partner http://psychology.suite101.com/article.cfm/after_youve_betrayed_your_spouse#ixzz0jCfHVAqs

(adapted by: Mas Ayu)